So I needed a Clarke floor scrubber for my warehouse space. Heard they're tough machines, but man, finding where to actually buy one felt like chasing ghosts. Started simple – Googled "Clarke cleaning machines near me" like anybody would.

The Online Rabbit Hole

Clicked through pages of sponsored ads first. Big retailer sites showed models listed, but every dang one said "out of stock" or "discontinued" when I tried adding to cart. Felt like those shady clickbait traps where the price jumps after you login.

Phone Tag With Dealers

Found Clarke’s official dealer locator. Called three local spots:

• First place said they stopped carrying Clarke last year
• Second guy told me to call back Tuesday, then hung up on me twice
• Third was just background noise like someone dropped the phone in a washing machine

Ended up taking screenshots of error pages just to prove I wasn't hallucinating.

Secondhand Circus

Checked used marketplaces like a desperate raccoon. Found one listing two hours away. Drove all morning to see it, showed up sweaty – dude says "Oh sorry, sold it yesterday bro." Another seller sent me photos of a completely different machine covered in mystery sludge.

The Breakthrough

Finally stumbled on this industrial supply forum thread from 2021. Some user mentioned buying from equipment rental companies when they rotate stock. Called every rental place in the county like a telemarketer on energy drinks. One manager said "Funny timing – our Clarke C20 just came off lease yesterday".

Lessons Learned

Why’s it this hard? Turns out Clarke mostly cares about business contracts, not regular people. If you don’t have a company tax ID? Good luck. Ended up paying cash for that used machine. Got home exhausted with my "new" 2018 model covered in suspicious pink residue. Still cleans floors though.