So my boat's been sitting in the marina all season, covered in that green gunk and salt crust. Just awful. Figured it's time to get a proper cleaning, but man, I had zero clue what it actually costs around here. Started digging into "affordable" boat cleaning companies near me. Here's how that went down.

The Phone Call Circus Begins

First, I grabbed my phone and started calling around like crazy. Seriously, dialed numbers all morning:

• Company A sounded super professional. Guy said "Oh yeah, prices start low!" Then he hit me with: "Well actually, for YOUR boat size..." Added $50 right there. Then asked "Is it trailered?" Nope, docked. Bam! Another $50 surcharge. Basically they nickle and dime you before you even say yes.
• Company B was cheaper upfront. Quoted $150 flat. Got suspicious. Asked EXACTLY what’s included. Dude goes quiet. Turns out "basic wash" meant hull ONLY. Want the deck wiped down? That’s extra. Clean the vinyl seats? Extra again. Cockpit drains? Forget it.
• Company C sounded too cheap. $95 "all-in". My brain screamed scam. Asked about insurance and bonding. Crickets. Then he mumbled something like "Yeah, sure, totally covered, buddy..." Yeah, nah. Hard pass.

Breaking Down the Real Costs

After sweating through those calls, I figured out what really matters:

• Size DOES murder your wallet. My 24-footer costs WAY more than my neighbor’s 16-foot skiff. Just physics. More scrubbing, more soap, more time.
• "Extras" ain't optional. Bird crap? Oxidation? Slimy waterline? They see those and cha-ching goes the meter. One guy wanted $75 extra for "stubborn marine growth." Basically charged me extra for doing the actual job.
• Chemical costs sting. Some outfits charge extra for "premium eco-friendly solutions." Others bake it into the quote. Gotta ask straight up: "Is cleaner INCLUDED?" Saved myself $30 by asking.

The Final Choice & Lesson Learned

Ended up going with Company B - but only after haggling. Paid $180 total after demanding they include the deck and wipe down the console. Still felt robbed though.

Big takeaway? "Affordable" is a mirage. You gotta:

• Ask SPECIFICS about EVERY charge.
• Demand a breakdown BEFORE they touch your boat.
• Assume the quoted price is fantasy until they see the actual mess.

Basically, boat cleaning companies? They'll find reasons to charge you more once they’re staring at your grimy hull. Be annoying. Ask every question. Or just buy a scrub brush and cry while you do it yourself.